Perfecting Marriage- The “How to’s”

Components of a Marriage 

Let me start off by saying my marriage is not perfect, but I do always strive to make it better. I firmly believe in give and take in a marriage. In perfecting marriage, there may be some things that I don’t like to do but I do it anyway because it’s not all about me. We are one as a unit. Just like there is no I in team, there is also no I in a marriage. There are certain components of a marriage that should be followed closely and those are friendship, intimacy, and communication.

Friendship

If you sit back and take a look, the couples with the best marriages have the strongest foundation of friendship.  They stay together the longest and really understand each other. This means that you show appreciation. You do things in return even if you don’t want to it. Build trust. Keep your promises. Have fun with one another. Learn something new together. Be supportive and listen. Argue like a boss (not literally). Don’t raise your voice. Be apologetic when necessary.  And of course, always be thankful.

Intimacy

I have five little people so this plays a major role in our marriage. It is almost impossible to build a strong marriage without sexual intimacy.  Set boundaries for couples time away from family time. Touch each other often. Sit next to one another. Start a hello kiss routine.  Say “I love you” more. Try role playing. Be spontaneous.

Communication

There should be a clear open line of communication. This is the time where phones are put away and you are giving your undivided attention.  If your spouse is not looking at you then they are not actively listening. Be loving in your communication and express your thoughts in a loving way. Be prepared to take correction. Stay positive.  Express your concerns clearly and to the point. You do not want to get to the point where you are angry or frustrated.

Perfecting your marriage can take time. Be open and willing to make changes.